Intro

So I guess I skipped the obligatory introduction blog we're supposed to write. I don't even know where to start. Its kind of hard to find words to describe my life and where its ended up and exactly why. Especially when I'm not even quite sure. For a long time, I thought I had everything figured out. My life had been heading in one direction, and I always thought that's what I wanted and that I was happy. But who really actually has it all figured out at 22? No one, that's who. And if they say they do, just give it time, because their world will crash down same as mine did. I had a full time job, not a career, but a job. I had a home with a loving man. The plan was for me to quit my job after the wedding and be a full time mom. We didn't have much, but we had friends and family and a nice simple home. And then one day he was heading home early from work, riding down the road on his Harley. Not a cloud in the sky, in a great mood, until someone didn't see him and pulled out and t-boned him. He survived, but barely. I'll make this part of the story short. We moved in with his parents and it was six months before he walked again. And let me just say, living with the in-laws is NEVER healthy for a relationship. No matter how in love you are or how long you've been in this relationship. And eventually it broke us, the fighting and awkwardness. He was never the same again after the accident. And I haven't been either, nor do I think I ever will be. So I moved in with my grandmother. And I tried to piece together my life and try to figure out how to be one again. Then I went to work one day and the big boss came down to say my "job has been eliminated". Eliminated? Really? That easy? All the years with this company, working, selling, organizing, hiring, firing and I can be eliminated? Discarded like a used napkin? Like some asshole in a corner office just said, "You know what? I want more money. Where can we cut some slack? Everyone with this job title is superfluous. Give 'em the axe. Papa needs a new Audi." And I'm done. Its not about the crap job. Those are a dime a dozen. But how many times can a girl be rejected in that time frame? So here I was, 24. Unemployed, single, and living with my grandmother. What a catch, right? I didn't know what to do. So I thought, why not sell my car, pack my things, and move to Florida where I know no one, and go to mechanics school, where I'm completely unprepared? Sounds good! So here I am. When I started school, I barely knew that something that's carbureted wasn't made to drink. But I'm learning every day and getting through with a 4.0 GPA. I have no idea where I will go when I graduate or even if I really wanna be a motorcycle mechanic when I grow up. I have 45 weeks left of school. Although I'm tired and wanna go home. And its a struggle every day to not miss my ex and to not call him. And its a struggle to work full time for pennies and barely make rent. The good news is, I've lost a little weight because I can't really afford to eat! Anyway, that's where I am now. One day at a time.